in moderation

I spent the whole day at home today - practicing!

however, i'm still undecided as to whether or not days like these are good for me. haha. i mean, i do enjoy it - time goes by so quick when you get on a roll. but progress is still kind of slow. i'm only maybe about 45secs in? and a kinda shaky 45secs at that. haha. another 5mins or so to go (and its gonna get much harder!) however, perhaps the best outcome of this is to abandon computer/video gaming for this as a far more productive substitute. i wonder what mom thinks? haha :) i think it would come down to the weighing out of cost(of my new hobby) vs wastedtime(from playing games) for her to decide. hahaha. ohwell, not that she knows about it (yet) anyway (unless dad told her)

meanwhile, i heard the best piece of advice from dr lim this evening. it was so nonchalant, kinda mixed in with comments about the taste of our dinner, but ah words of wisdom from our ex-president haha.

i suppose it was from Ecclesiastes, but the way he said it was so simple. so matter of fact.

every now and then, dr lim drops really valuable stuff like this (which reminds us also why we respect him much) but it really also offsets all the rubbish he sometimes utters (also there was quite a bit over dinner haha)

sorry to bring you back to earth, dr lim :)

i remember also feeling some kind of epiphany/revelation this afternoon after one of those shower qt's (lol), but i can't seem to remember it anymore. it's just as Tim had talked about on Sunday! how it's so clear while you're in the shower but when you step out it becomes hazy. hahaha. i actually smiled when he said that because i know exactly how that feels, and today was no exception. i only vaguely remember who it was regarding and that it was about some action on my part. hmmm. i hope it comes back to me :)

oh! and to my surprise, i watched a bollywood film today. and i thoroughly enjoyed it!!!

om shanti om

i found myself wanting to sing and dance along sometimes. hahahahaha

anyway, back to the topic

yeah i find that days like this are okay. as long as it's done in moderation. and, more importantly, the thought processes (the thinking really) needs to be in moderation. looking back at the past, i think my mind has always been really good at getting too far ahead of reality even in a visual sense (ie. dreaming). i suppose this helps me draw, and helps my art (and design), but still. i'm not sure how it helps me get closer to You.

everytime i want to strike out at it myself, i am humbly reminded again that i am not my own

and that things take time. and patience.

and, maybe that was why dr lim made so much sense just then.


this attitude of surrender is not characterised or brought about by ceasing to care, but because i care much.

"There are many plans in man's heart, Nevertheless the Lord's counsel - that will stand." prov 19:21

sometimes i feel like i can barely contain it. and yet, at the same time i know that only You could truely take it all